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The author Thomas Ulrich in his book, * Made for One Another, defines soulmates to be twin souls, dual souls, one soul embodying the male principle the other embodying the female or two halves of the same person.

In his book he states that according to Edgar Cayce, in the beginning of creation a soul was a complete whole. It was both male and female.  He goes on to conclude that the first souls were able to create a companion by splitting that companion off from themselves.  

The only way to understand this theory is metaphysically and in non-physical terms. The idea of a human body separating itself and surviving would be impossible. A separation of the ethereal body is conceivable.       



To better understand the etheric body, Lawrence and Phoebe Bendit wrote a book called, * The Etheric Body of Man. In their book they refer to the etheric body as the aura. They say it is a misconception to believe the etheric body is only outside the body, but rather it penetrates every atom as well as extends beyond.


One of my favorite artists Alex Gray published a book, * Sacred Mirrors. In his book he shares his incredible artistic talent.  He illustrates his clear insight into the anatomy of the human body and the surrounding energy field. One of his paintings, Psychic Energy System, portrays in great detail this energy field. His paintings bring to life the cosmic physiology. He strips away our coat of flesh and exposes man from the inside. He further captures our ethereal field in great detail on canvas. He illustrates hundreds of circuits of energy that are active at all times. These circuits are invisible to the naked eye.


Imagine your body with fine thin threads of electrical current extending from you. These currents are so fine they cannot be seen. They extend several feet in every direction. They are like tiny feelers. They connect to a person before we ever engage in conversation. These energy currents are positive and negative forces responding and rejecting. They reject energy completely different from their own and respond to similar patterns. These circuits play a very important part in what we attract. Soulmates are attracted to the ethereal body or the energy patterns of another. This is the initial attraction. The first conscious attraction can be either ethereal or physical. The attraction that lasts is the ethereal.


The soulmate relationship is a marriage of two similar souls or two similar energy patterns. When we are physically attracted to someone we hope for the opportunity to know that person. If you are physically attracted to a person more than spiritually, you should get to know the person before making commitments. Beyond physical appearance the soulmate is concerned with the soul.


In Bernard Gunther's book, * Energy Ecstasy, he sees man as energy in different degrees of speed, density and intensity. He says man is a series of ever changing energies. The soul or the spirit of the ethereal body is affected by the constant exchanging, interchanging and rearranging of the energy field. The etheric body is constantly changing. As we change we desire our partner to change. If one or the other partner doesn't grow in the same direction there is a strong chance of changing partners. It is rare to find someone on our own frequency of consciousness that is transforming in exactly the same way.


The soul of man is forever learning. Together soulmates learn life lessons. Soulmates help each other learn to further their soul growth. When you experience a strong mutual attraction, you may have met a soulmate. Your soulmate is not the physical person in front of you. Your soulmate is their spirit.


Your soul shows itself to you by the people you attract. When you are drawn to someone their energy will tell you all you need to know about your soul growth. Many clues to your own nature lie in what you attract and repel. You are always attracted to someone that reflects you or your own potential. You are rarely attracted to someone that is nothing like you. You are connected to your soulmate through attraction. Your soulmate has a similar or identical energy pattern causing you to feel a connection in their presence. When you are connected to your soulmate you influence them and they influence you. You are experiencing the soul's vibration. You may think of this energy as their attitude or personality. Your combined energy is magnetic.


There are certain Universal Laws, according to lecturer, Dick Sutphen that can help us understand why we attract certain individuals into our lives. They are:

1. The law of attraction; you can only attract to you those qualities you possess.

2. The law of reflection; the traits you respond to in others, you recognize in yourself.

3. The law of resistance; that which you resist, you draw to you and perpetuate it's influence in your life.


You are complete when you have grown to understand these principles and practice them. Elizabeth Clare Prophet says a soulmate is a mate of the soul, a true mating of heart, mind and spirit. Thomas Moore in his book, Soulmates, focuses on the soul of a relationship. He says a relationship is the place where the soul works out its destiny. He says the soul is a wide spacious area where fate plays its role.     

Deepak Chopra, best selling author and lecturer in an interview with Tony Robbins and author of Unlimited Power, tells about a research that was recently done with mice. According to Dr. Chopra, a set of mice were placed in a room and given electrical shocks. They were then removed. Another set of mice was brought in. He said that instantly the new set of mice began to panic. These mice smelled the hormones or pheromones of fear from the other mice. Humans also send off pheromones. He says that pheromones are the hormones of our emotional state. He believes every emotional state has its own hormonal energy that is not confined to the body but is released by the body.


The emotional energy field can now be captured on film.  It is done by a method called Kirlian photography. It is fascinating. The first time I had it done I was living in California. I was a country music singer and was in the process of recording an album in Nashville, Tennessee. I was very focused, determined and intent on getting the project done.


In the town of Temecula, Ca, there is a local bookstore named Lady of the Lake. One Friday evening they had a gentleman there who had a special camera that took aura photos. I wasn't sure I believed you could really capture your etheric field on camera but I was up to trying something new.


I sat down in front of the camera. The man taking the photo had me place my hands on two metal plates shaped like a hand. I stared into the lens of the camera. He took the picture. When the picture was developed you could barely see my face because of all the bright red color surrounding me. He told me he didn't know what I was involved with at the moment but that he could tell from the photo I was determined and focus. He suggested I relax a little and have more fun with what I was doing.


A few months passed. I finished my album and was back to work on stage performances. I became much more relaxed. This same gentleman happened to be at the local bookstore for another booking. I had another photo taken to see if my energy had changed. I was curious and I knew that my energy was different. I just wanted to see if the camera was authentic. After the picture developed I could see my face clearly. There were colors of purple and yellow surrounding me. The gentleman told me the intensity, referring to my last photo, was gone. He felt I was pleased with the results of my project. It was true.


I was excited about Kirlian photography. I shared it with a skeptical friend. He was not as impressed. He suggested the man sensed my energy and manipulated the camera. I didn't know enough about the camera to know if that was possible.


I put it out of my mind and began concentrating on a move to Nashville. I wanted a recording contract. Everyday I kept coming up with new ideas and once again, I became very intense, determined and focused.

It was at this time I was in another city in California driving to get to my next performance. I passed a bookstore that was advertising aura photos. I pulled my car over, parked and entered.


I walked in expecting to see the same gentleman. It was not. I had never seen the lady that was taking the pictures and she knew nothing of my past. When it came my turn, I sat down in the chair, placed my hands on the steel plates, stared into the camera and she snapped the picture. A few minutes later the picture was developed. You could barely see my face because I was surrounded with so much red. I was a believer. Emerson once said, "who you are shouts so loudly in my ears I can not hear what you are saying

Types of Soulmates

Dick Sutphen is the author of many best-selling books on metaphysical topics. I found his tape series, Predestined Love, interesting. In this series he discusses cases of men and women who discover reincarnation through regressive hypnosis. His clients tell stories that strongly suggest they have returned lifetime after lifetime to be reunited with their soulmate.


He says a soulmate or twin soul is a perfect partner. He feels you share the same vibrational level and a lineage of past lives. He believes soulmates have a relationship that allows both fulfilling their “dharmic direction” and accomplishing their "soul goals."


According to Mr. Sutphen there are different types of soulmates. Some soulmates are supposed to be together forever while other relationships are destined to end. A soulmate relationship is simply a love that is destined. These relationships fit into three categories: Karmic, Dharmic-Bond and Counterpart-Companions.


Mr. Sutphen lectures that Karmic-Companions are two people destined to form a union confronting unlearned lessons from past lives. Usually this relationship is centered on conflict until the lesson is learned. If the relationship cannot be healed, the couple must let go with love. If not, they will meet again in another lifetime.


I was living in California when I experienced several karmic relationships. It was also a time that I experienced a great amount of personal growth.  My focus had been on finding a relationship. I was recently divorced. Looking back, I realize I had poor self-esteem. My life had been unstable for several years and I did not enjoy being single. 


Relationships started entering my life. One at a time each relationship taught me something.  I fell in love with a half dozen men my first year in California. At times I felt desperate, alone and scared. Men often sensed my insecurity. I attracted men in my life that were troubled, because I was troubled. I'm sure if we met today it would be different. I am no longer attracted to the men in my past because I am no longer the same person. That was a time when I was projecting my need for fulfillment on others. I was unaware I was on a personal path of transformation.


The path to personal transformation can be long and exhausting. I had so much to learn about relationships. I had to learn relationships are excellent tools for the evolution of your own consciousness. I didn’t know needing someone for fulfillment was not love.  It was dependence. I learned being single was not a disease and no person was the answer to my life. It took a while, but I eventually realized where you leave each relationship is where you begin the next.  The more loving, forgiving and confident you are, the more love, forgiveness and confidence you receive.  Karmic companions are our friends.  Allow yourself to honor each relationship. Relationships are great teachers, if we choose to learn. 


The second soulmate type is Dharmic Bond-Companions. These soulmates share a goal. This relationship is like Karmic companion relationships in that two people come together combining their energy for one task, however when they have succeeded in reaching the common goal, their future depends on how they have structured their relationship. You will have few dharmic companions. You will always remember dharmic relationships. They will have a more dramatic affect on your life and may remain in your life on non-romantic terms.


My ex-husband is a dharmic relationship. We came together to have a beautiful baby girl. Our romantic relationship ended after four years. We have remained friends and we both participate in parenting our child. He was very influential in my life.  Most dharmic companions will hold a special place in your life and heart.


The third soulmate type is the Counterpart-Companions. These companions experience a loving, supportive relationship in which the couple will comfortably live their life. They will have problems, but most of the problems will be outside their relationship. They harmonize with each other. However, outside influences can challenge them. The relationship will usually last a lifetime.


I have met very few individuals that have a counterpart relationship. These relationships are often referred to as twin souls. These relationships communicate soul to soul through equality. No one is superior or inferior. They communicate honestly, openly and truthfully. The two people are usually evolving at the same rate and frequency. These soulmates do not limit their lives by staying with each other because it is the right thing to do. They stay together because they want to be together. There is mystery surrounding what holds these relationships together.


Searching for a Soulmate

When I began searching for a soulmate my first questions were; who would this person be and what would this person be like?  I envisioned him as kind hearted. He would be skilled to cope with stress and life's pressures. He would love me for all that I am. He would accept my past as part of my path without jealousy, judgments or punishment. He would comfort me through all my experiences, good and bad. He would love me unconditionally and without reserve. He would have compassion when I make mistakes and kind when I cry. He would be gentle, passionate, and strong. He would be my lover and my friend. What were the chances of any one person fitting this description? I confess I laughed. More questions kept coming. Could this person really exist? Believing gave me hope. I could not get him out of my imagination. Unknowingly I was on a mission, determined to find my soulmate. 


My search had begun. I would journal nightly my thoughts, ideas and progress. I could see my soulmate in my mind's eye. He had beautiful dark hair and a tanned complexion. His eyes sparkled. I fantasized him sweeping me off my feet and whisking me away on a romantic holiday. His touch was magic. He was flawless. He was every woman’s dream, and he was mine.


Time passed. My life changed and so did my relationships. With each relationship I grew. I became more adventurous, passionate and wise. I had an expectation that any moment he would arrive. I was looking and was consumed with finding him. I felt attached to him and would speak to him in my mind. I wrote songs and poetry about him. He was my life, my breath, and my soul. I meditated, I prayed, I begged God for him. He didn’t come.


After a while, I became very discouraged. I began to question the love I was imagining. I was having trouble distinguishing between a sexual experience and a soulmate experience. Time would always tell. Relationship after relationship ended. 


When on a search, you seem to encounter others that are on the same search. During that time I had the opportunity to speak with several individuals about their idea of a soulmate. They invariably described someone who would rescue, romance or in some way complete them. Like me, they wanted that perfect person. Women seemed to desire a hero. Men desired physical appearance and a sex goddess. One man even described his soulmate to me down to her toes. Physical beauty and heroism were at the top of the list. Ironically none of these people, including me, had found their imagined soulmate. 


What was I missing? Thoughts began flashing through my mind. What would a perfect person want with a person like me? What about me was attractive? How could I change to become more attractive internally as well as externally?


I began studying personal development. I learned egos have no place in a relationship and feelings dictate what we do, say, think and believe. I read you experience love from within not from someone externally. I read the words but I really didn’t understand them. I read that a soulmate’s job is not to fulfill your fantasies, but help you be more loving, giving and gentle. I learned real soulmates don’t let you off the hook. They challenge you to be all you can. We seem to fall into negative habits of repetition that hold us on the surface of what we can achieve and usually don’t live up to our own potential


I began to realize when you actually accept another for who they are. You give them an invitation to change. I found accepting oneself is the creative force of change. I had to change. I needed to examine whom I was in order to change. I relaxed into a meditative state and began. I allowed everything positive and negative to come to mind. I quietly listened as thoughts about myself began to surface.


The soul’s deepest desire is to be seen as we are and loved. In my mind I thought of everything. I was determined to accept the things I could not change and change what I could. I wanted to be everything I desired in a soulmate. I wanted to be kind-hearted; skilled to cope with life’s pressures and love myself for the entire person I am, past and present. I wanted to be a comfort giver, unconditional lover...etc. I knew like attracts like and I needed the attributes I desired in my soulmate. This realization made me ask the difficult question “which of these have I mastered?  Truthful self-examination is difficult and change is not easy. Old habits are hard to kick.

According to JZ Knight in her book, * Ramtha Intensive Soulmates, Ramtha, a channeled entity states, "there are very few entities who ever find their soulmate, ever." He goes on to say that we have lived many lifetimes without seeing the other side of ourselves. He says that we think we have met this special person and yet in time they disappear from our life. We assume that our soulmate would be everything we desire.


He encourages individual’s to examine himself or herself. How desirable are you? How honorable are you? How much integrity and virtue do you process? He then goes on "Behold! Look at the door! Come forth, soulmate! You turn around to see, with great anticipation, what your soulmate looks like, what would you do if it was you walking in the door, with all of your hang-ups and limitations."


Finding your counterpart soulmate takes time. I’ve learned invaluable information while searching. There is no prince rushing to save you. Soulmates are rarely what you imagined but exactly what you need. Soulmates come into our life to help us heal. They expose areas we want undiscovered. They help us become more intimate.


The eyes are the windows to the soul. When you look someone deep in the eyes you engage in a rare form of intimacy. Do you long for the day you gaze into your soulmates eyes and experience the sense of being whole. Most people won’t allow intimacy and look away. Soulmates have this intimacy.


In order to experience the soulmate relationship we must look past our intention and what we expect. Soulmates challenge our inconsistencies. They stand by you, not necessarily agree with you. A soulful relationship offers two difficult challenges. The first is to come to know oneself. The second is to get to know the deep subtle richness of the other. You may have to enter the confusion of another. This is a way soulmates reveal their souls. You will touch upon issues charged with emotion. Soulmate relationships cause you to dig deep into the stuff of the soul.


A relationship may look like an arrangement of two people getting together but it is more profound. It is the arrangement of a soul recognizing itself in another. Soulmates are brought together for growth. If you do not work out your issues in each relationship, you will attract another partner with the same soul agenda. We are quick to see other's dysfunction. We deny our own inappropriate behavior and cast blame. We attract into our life what we express. In truth, the quality of our relationships is products of our own habitual thoughts and actions.

Soulmate Relationships

Dick Sutphen tells a story that caught my attention. B.J. Thomas and his wife Gloria met by accident. Gloria had been to one of B.J.'s performances. B.J. claimed she looked familiar.


In November 1967 they began a relationship and on December 9,1968 they married. Thirteen months later their daughter was born. B.J. was climbing the charts and at the same time experiencing tremendous pressure due to his rise in fame. Success came and with it came B.J.'s addiction to drugs. Gloria encouraged B.J. to seek psychiatric care. It never helped. Friends and family couldn't understand why Gloria stayed with B.J. For six years they vacillated from intoxicating love to hate for each other.


In 1974 Gloria finally took their daughter and left. Within eight months they had reconciled. The dysfunction continued and Gloria sank into depression. One day she awoke in a hospital. There a Christian that helped her pull out of depression befriended her. Prayer became part of her life and seemed to bring peace. She and B.J. separated.  In January 1976 the Thomas's reunited. Gloria influenced B.J. to give his life to God and he did. He gave up all drugs and began a new life. 


B.J.'s performances soon changed to include more spiritual material. He was enjoying the changes. It seemed to fit him well. It didn't go over well with his “born again ” fans. They wanted him to discontinue performing his secular songs. He was outcast by the Christians. Since the day B.J. accepted God in his life he never doubted the relationship. He would not accept limited, judgmental attitudes. He and Gloria made a decision to live life their way. Far from a life of harmony, they examined other spirituals paths. Life did get better.


In June of 1984 B.J. and his wife met with Dick Sutphen for a past life regression. Under hypnosis Mr. Sutphen heard them recall, in detail, past lives together. Both B.J. and Gloria claim that after going through regression they understand they were destined to be together.


Gayle is a very gregarious person. Whenever we speak she always makes me laugh.  She has an open quality that I admire.  She's up for fun as long as it doesn't go against her moral beliefs. Don, on the other hand, is very mild mannered. He doesn't say much. He doesn't giggle and howl with his friends. He is a very hard worker and her strongest support. He's like the Energizer Bunny, he keeps going and going...He has a calmness that is refreshing.


Gayle tells their story of being childhood sweethearts and how their relationship grew into adult passion. She explains how much fun they have together. She also tells of their family problems and financial struggles. She talks openly about their middle son who spent time in prison for an adolescent felony. Don and Gayle also emotionally supported their oldest son as his illegitimate child was born. She tells the surprise they experienced when the child was born black. No DNA tests were needed. The child belonged to another man. You feel the disappointment in her voice for her son’s pain.  She talks openly about her marriage and when she mentions Don, you hear the love in her voice. You feel the passion that is still alive after 25 years. You see the twinkle in her eyes. When it comes to their relationship she has inner peace. She says their relationship has been tried and tested. She is honest when she expresses there have been times she hasn’t liked Don, not even a little bit, but has always loved him. She has so much good to say in spite of all the hardships. Don and Gayle could write a romantic love story and never leave their own lives.


The last time I spoke with Gayle she still loved being a wife, a mother and now a grandmother. I learned about relationships from her. Not by what she would say, but by what she would do.  Don and Gayle were destined to be together. Their desire for each other has sustained their relationship.


I have another friend that claims the spirit of her soulmate was actually able to integrate into her husband's body. She claims the soul of her husband was exchanged with the soul of her soulmate. Sharon married Steve ten years ago. They met in Nashville, TN. She had just gone through a tumultuous divorce. She met and married Steve out of friendship. They did not experience deep passion. They were drawn together for companionship.


When I met Sharon she was doing spiritual work in Nashville. I became friends with her and enjoyed hearing her life experiences. She had grown and changed quite a bit since she had married Steve. When I met her they had been married six years. Their marriage was strained. Sharon had gone deep into spiritual studies and Steve had trouble relating. Steve tried to study with her but felt at times he was pacifying Sharon. He didn’t have the same spiritual connection. They began speaking of divorce. Neither really wanted a separation but their lives were taking different directions. They had given up the physical intimacy of their marriage. Sharon claimed it was unfulfilling and desperately wanted to find her twin soul.


She talked openly to Steve about her soulmate. He understood. He believed in her. Sharon said that her soulmate she calls “Ty” came to her during a meditation. Ty expressed he wanted to be with her as much as she wanted to be with him. The problem was that Ty did not have a physical body. He was ethereal. Sharon says she communicated with him through meditation. They wanted to find a way to be together. Sharon relayed this information to Steve. It was Steve that suggested that Ty integrate with his body and become part of him. Sharon was taken with the idea. She spoke with Ty and he consented to try.


Sharon and Steve practiced by going into meditation. Steve would invite the spirit of Ty to be a part of him. Steve and Ty tried several times to integrate but were unsuccessful. They were discouraged but kept trying. Sharon said that after one of their meditations Steve's eyes appeared blue. She questioned this since his eyes were normally brown. He seemed to have softness about him that Steve didn’t have. Steve seemed disoriented. Sharon and Steve went to bed that evening and actually held each other.


The next morning she looked at Steve. His eyes were brown and he seemed to be his old self. She was very disappointed. She went into meditation to speak with Ty. They had a conversation about what had taken place. Ty told her that Steve’s vibration level could not sustain him long.  Steve would need to make some spiritual and lifestyle changes for this integration to work.


Steve began meditating every night to raise his vibrational level. They continued the integration process. Sharon said it took a few years. Ty's energy would come and go through Steve. Ty’s presence and eye color would be the indicator. On a trip to Sedona, AZ two years later, Steve and Ty integrated completely. Sharon says she has not seen Steve since. She claims she and Ty enjoy their spiritual as well as sexual life together.  According to Sharon McCain soulmate energy can integrate with a body that can hold it’s vibration.

Finding your Soulmate. The idea of looking for your soulmate it is an admission that you are separated. With this admission comes the fact that anything separated from its source has a strong chance of becoming lost. This explains the disconnection we feel when we are not experiencing intimate love.


Real intimacy is when you are emotionally naked before each other. There is always a higher purpose to a soulmate relationship. It is for real intimacy and it is the desire for that intimacy that creates a bond between two souls, they will find a way to join together. The longing to experience intimacy keeps your soulmate alive in the subconscious.


Jess Stearn's book, * Soulmates, is full of documented accounts of people finding their soulmate. He expresses thoughts about his investigation. He believes soulmates are spiritual partners whose love is tied somehow to a universal love.  In his research he states that soulmates claim to experience one tell-tell sign. There is a delicious urgency, a feeling of warmth and instant familiarity, an overpowering impression of having known one another before. These can be characteristics of soulmates, but one should not limit them to this formula. Many times this is also the characteristic of karmic relationships. He concludes his book by saying, "the deeper people searched within them, the more they made of themselves, the greater likelihood of finding a soulmate.


Several years ago I fell head over heels in love with a man from Sacramento.  I experienced a weekend of heaven. I felt strongly this person was my twin soul. He swept me off my feet. As it turned out, he literally jerked my feet out from under me. He romanced me, made love to me and promised me the world. He was my knight in shining armor. He said he had come to rescue me. He was my soulmate.


We danced together and made plans for our future. He looked directly in my eyes and said, "I've known you before, I don't know where or how, but I know you." I was mesmerized. He was the one and he said all the right things. This relationship lasted three weeks. I was devastated. Obviously this person was a karmic companion and I had something to learn from the experience. He was a liar as well as unfaithful. I was left to examine how I attracted him. I knew I was not a liar or an unfaithful person. It took some time, but I did come to realize. I lied to myself and was unfaithful responding to my own needs and desires. I was made aware of my need to please others more than the need to please myself. I developed better relationships as I became stronger.


Humankind can play shallow games. Our egotistic nature likes to show off. We act like we are something we're not. We hide our dysfunction and have difficulty being honest. We fear we are not good enough. We lack confidence in ourselves, yet present ourselves perfect for the person we are pursuing. If you play this way, you will be busted. 


We constantly do things that do not promote intimacy. At the same time, we want our soulmate in the purest sense. This dichotomy is why most individuals never find their soulmate. Relationships are challenges. The path that leads to your soulmate is honesty. Your walls must come down in order to experience such a relationship. As long as you have walls you will not be a true partner.


The way to your soulmate is through self-love. You cannot truly love another when you do not love yourself.  Loving yourself is the beginning. Be honest and open. Through your honesty and openness you experience intimacy and find your soulmate.


When you are genuinely ready you will find your twin soul. People claim they are ready but their soulmate hasn't appeared. It is possible to be emotionally, but not spiritually ready or vice versa. Most people claiming they were ready, looking back, realize they were not.


Nature shows us there is nothing in the universe out of rhythm. Such perfect timing the conscious mind cannot fathom holds our universe together. Your soulmate will show up right on time. Be devoted to your highest good. Desire your soulmate for the right reasons. You and your soulmate may have different interests but your personal development will be compatible. If you find yourself making excuses for another's behavior you must question what in your behavior needs corrected. Once your behavior is corrected you will no longer be attracted to poor behavior and you will lovingly leave. It is not your mission to change your partner. It is your mission to change yourself. The soul always manifests itself. This is your journey of change.


The soulmate that we refer to most in conversations is the counterpart or twin soul. This is that ultimate relationship. If you have decided you are ready to meet this special person.  It is time to take a look at your own soul. Begin by honoring all prior relationships for the purpose they played in your soul’s development. Here is an exercise you can do to help attract your soulmate in five easy steps.

1. Begin by making a list of the qualities you want most to appear in your life.

2. Write down everything you can think of that you want in your soulmate.

3. Write down every thing about yourself that would attract them.

4.Write down the things about yourself that may not be attractive.

5. Begin radiating the attractive qualities you desire.


These 5 steps set a vibratory field of consciousness that will attract those qualities. You won’t find your soulmate by looking. You find your soulmate by changing.


The next exercise is a meditation:

1. Relax and begin to breath deeply. With each breath out, exhale all tension from your body.  Continue three or four times or until you feel the tension leave.

2. Use your imagination and remember a time that you felt peaceful. A time you felt great about yourself.

3. Allow the moment to penetrate your mind and body. Feel the moment with every breath you breathe.

4. Now, remember what you want to change about your character.

5. What would be the end result of this change? How would you feel? How are you different? How has it enhanced your life? Bring this image into your mind and hold it there.  If you loose the image you can retrieve it.

6. Feel the way you would feel with this new image. How would you feel differently? What would be different? What must you change in order for this result to take place? Listen for the answers.

7. One by one, name the old characteristics you desire to change. You are going to release them by placing them in a large balloon. Allow the wind to lift them off into the sky and out of your sight.


Do this exercise twice a day and it will condition your mind to make changes. The exercise alone will not make the changes but it will condition you to do whatever it takes to change. It is very important at the end of the meditation you relinquish all attachments of how the changes occur.  If you are attached, you remain connected to the situation and that attachment will hinder its manifestation.


The next exercise will help you recognize your soulmate. The first seven steps are the same.

8. Imagine a relationship with your soulmate. What are you like and what are they like? Bring this image into your mind. Focus only on the end result.  Hold that image and feel it as long as you can then let go.

You are sending the image to the universe for manifestation. Allow the universe to use its perfection in bringing your soulmate. Trust the universe is the expert in creation. Do this twice a day. Morning is the best time because it is when your mind is the most alert, also in the evening when your mind relaxes.  Continue radiating what you want to attract. You will find your soulmate.


Recognizing Your Counterpart Soulmate.


How do you recognize a soulmate relationship? Rishikavi Raghudas, Writer for PhenomeNEWs Magazine, writes that one of the first things we notice about people who we are convinced are soulmates is they are comfortable with each other. They seem to understand each other and offer support instead of criticism. He feels that soulmates emotional and spiritual interweaving comes more naturally. They are less drawn to emotional melodrama. Mr. Raghudas feels that most soulmates don't find each other until they have gone through a major part of their own "stuff." He also feels that couples come together again and again to confront and hopefully resolve past karma.


JZ Knight the author of, A State of Mind, claims she is reunited with her twin soul. She was married to a wonderful man named Mark Burnett at the time she met her twin soul.  She says she saw her twin soul’s picture in a magazine article. She claims she knew instantly he was her soulmate. She was not eager to break up her marriage, even though she claims her marriage was already spiritually over.

Jeff, her soulmate, when asked about their relationship replies, "it is important that people know that being soulmates doesn't make everything automatically perfect, otherwise, there would be nothing to overcome and you wouldn't learn anything."

You will recognize your soulmate when you recognize yourself in a person. A soulmate will admire you when you admire yourself and love you when you love yourself. You will recognize your soulmate through your own love and admiration. They will recognize you by the same principles.


You will know when you have found your soulmate because you are completely comfortable. You share the same spirit. You experience a profound connection and a rare form of intimacy. There are no tell-tell signs that a person is your twin soul. There are however guidelines. They grow together. They change together.  They have some kind of spiritual base.  Twin souls endure the test of time. The relationship supports you in honoring your true self. Friendships are different than soulmates. Friendships share experiences in a different sense. They are like the extras in a major motion picture. They are the people you see in the background. They are necessary to complete your life but play a minor role in your soul evolution. You will leave friendships during your lifetime. You will leave some soulmates. You will never leave your counterpart soulmate.



Your soulmate is not a person. It has no body. It is the magnetic patterns that attract you to a person. As you change you attract a partner with like patterns. Your inner guidance is always directing, if you listen. When you become the person you desire, you will experience a counterpart relationship. A person does not necessarily have to change partners to experience this soulmate relationship. You could be with your soulmate and not be able to recognize them because you haven’t learned basic skills that connect you to your own love.


Your soulmate could be in your life now. If they are, you will change together. I have watched these relationships unfold and last a lifetime. The search for the great relationship is the inner search we have to connect with something greater. The connection is with our own spiritual quest and us. We are ultimately seeking a complete union between our true nature, the universe or God and ourselves. Follow your inner guidance to change. Real love is feeling your own fullness. You will find your soulmate when you have healed from within. 


Soulmates know love is eternal and is not limited to a relationship. They realize passion has a tendency to appear and disappear, but love always remains. They look for light to appear through darkness. They relinquish harsh judgment. They know how to commune with God through nature and love. They don’t demand that everything always be pleasurable. They understand men and women are different. They feel safe to be themselves. They understand the true meaning of commitment. They choose to see the good in their partner. While closely connected, they remain individualized. They understand they are shaping their lives with their own thoughts, feelings and actions. They have a carefree attitude. They communicate harmoniously. They allow their life to be a dance, coming together, pulling apart. They understand relationships have seasons just as nature has seasons. You may or may not have recognized your soulmate. You may not have known what attracts you to another person. It is your own energy patterns, both positive and negative. Change yourself! You will never know for sure if a person is truly your soulmate as long as you are not true to yourself and to your own soul. When you are, it will be very clear whether the person is your soulmate. Become all you wish in a soulmate. Be patient. You have and will always attract your soulmate.


"Would you be happy to meet you? So prepare yourself, so you will be happy with yourself. Start dealing with the aspects of thy self that you do not like. What you create in yourself you shall find. The soulmate is a mirror, and the mirror reflects itself perfectly. The neurotic reaches for the neurotic, negative for the negative, and so forth. That is why marriages fail. They have not prepared themselves. Looking for their counterpart, they find it." Ramtha


One of my favorite recording artists, Doug Stone, recorded a song on his 1992, From the Heart, Album. The song, Made for Loving You, was written by Curly Putman and Sonny Throckmorton. The song summarizes my feelings about soulmates. The words are:


Everybody sings a different kind of song

All God’s children have somewhere they belong

Oh I’ve heard it said and I know it must be true 

We were meant to be, I’m made for loving you.

Everybody had something he must be

Call it fortune or just call it destiny

I have spent my life making my way to you

See the way we fit I’m made for loving you

Like blue skies always seem to go with sunshine

And just as laughter goes along with good times

I have spent my life making my way to you

See the way we fit I’m made for loving you


Soulmates fit together and when something fits you know. Having a soulmate is real. Soulmates are finding each other. I challenge you to find yours!


Rhonda McFarland, copyright 1999


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